Ok, so maybe not instant. I had a volleyball game this morning, so I started the show about half an hour late. But I am watching and reacting in real time with the 8th WWE blood money show: Crown Jewel 2022.
Lashley vs. Lesnar
Glad they started this out by retelling the past between these two back to the Rumble. Bobby gets out quick and strong and beats Brock all around the ringside area. Lashely with the spear through the timekeepers wall and it looked like Brock’s face bounced off the corner of the barrier. But Brock with the superhuman comeback, selling the knee after getting it bounced off the stairs right out of the gate. Lashley is the heel over the kingdom, not used to hearing that since Mania. Lashley gets the Hurt Lock in but Lesnar wins via the Hart/Piper finish from WM 8. Two big guys tell a great story, only wish they got more than 6 minutes here. But both guys look good and let’s run this one again, maybe at the Rumble, especially after Bobby gets his post-match heat.
RATING: ***
WWE Women’s Tag Team Titles: Asuka and Alexa Bliss (c) vs. Damage CTL (Dakota Kai and Iyo Sky)
Great start to this one, all four women showing off with some solid chain wrestling. The champs working well together despite only having worked together for a short time. Askua eventually takes the heat after hurting her knee on a drop kick to the outside. Bliss gets the hot tag and Cole shows that he doesn’t actually know what a meteora is. Alexa does his Dakota with a beautiful looking tornado DDT. And they got a tower of doom in. Champs poised to retain but Nikki Cross comes through the crowd with the interference and the titles swap hands for the 2nd time in 6 days. This is clearly a way to get her and Asuka started into different programs, but man was the whole thing just rushed. Also, the second straight match that centered around a knee injury. Not that it made it bad or anything, just something about doing the same thing in back to back matches.
RATING: **1/2
Steel Cage Match: Drew McIntyre vs. Karrion Kross
I can’t say enough how much I love Kross’ entrance and it only looks better on the biggest of stages. Oh, but Drew wins with the drone light show forming a sword over the stadium. Props to Wade Barrett working a Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels quote into his analysis: “When the milk turns sour, Drew McIntyre isn’t the kind of pussycat to drink it”. This one is a chance to slow the pace of the show while these two big athletes pound on each other. Both guys giving and taking a beating and showing some impressive looking maneuvers in there. McIntyre busts out a Michinoku Driver, Kross with a viscous looking Saito suplex. Kross Hammer gets dropped but instead of going for a pin or the door, Kross climbs the cage to set up a huge superplex back into the center of the ring. Scarlett does find a way to interfere, as she maces McIntyre and the ref as Drew made for the door, but McIntyre with the cut off. But the finish left much to be desired, there’s a lot going on involving Scarlett but she locks the door in Drew’s face, apparently forgetting that the cage can be climbed. It just left she and Kross looking dumber than they needed to.
RATING: **1/2
The O.C. (AJ Styles, Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows) vs. The Judgment Day (Finn Balor, Damien Priest and Dominik Mysterio)
Dominik spent a lot of time in this one getting beat on which just advanced the story of his overconfidence since spurning his father. I have to call out an awesome looking spot that could have been a massive tower of doom, but it became a superplex and a pair of electric chairs. This was a great six-man tag that was entertaining and more importantly did everything it needed to do to keep this war going, hopefully into an intergender Survivor Series match and more one-on-one encounters between Balor and Styles.
RATING: ****
Braun Strowman vs. Omos
Two huge meaty dudes doing meaty dude things. Omos traveling alone tonight as MVP couldn’t make the trip to Saudi Arabia. As a former Muslim turned atheist, MVP could have been subject to arrest because renouncing Islam is a criminal offense in the kingdom. Just throwing that out there to remind you that this show is being held under the repressive regime known for massive human rights violations. That puts Strowman yelling “Saudi Arabia’s behind me” at the faceoff into a different context…
Omos looking good early, dominating the Monster of Monsters, even slamming Strowman with ease. Omos also doing a lot of talking and this match doing exactly what I floated during our preview show; the Nigerian giant may not win but they are going to make him look as good as possible in the process and this is probably the best Omos has looked in the ring. Also impressive as hell, Strowman gets Omos up for a running powerslam. It wasn’t pretty but the giant may have been made even in defeat.
RATING: **
Undisputed WWE Tag Team Titles: The Usos (c) vs. The Brawling Brutes (Ridge Holland and Butch)
The Brutes on a revenge tour for their fallen leader Sheamus, did I mention we saw them Pillman Sheamus’ arm live? The commentary team gave away the winner during the entrances, pointing out multiple times that the winners have to defend the belts next Friday against the New Day and that the Usos are so close to breaking the New Day’s record for longest tag title reign. Ridge Holland continues to impress with his work in this one. It’s like he takes massive jumps every time I see him work on the main roster. A solid match even if we knew the outcome. Plenty of close calls with the Brutes looking like real threats to the Usos’ belts. Also, love the avalanche 1D that they ended the contest with.
RATING: ***1/2
Last Woman Standing for the Raw Women’s Championship: Bianca Belair (c) vs. Bayley
Bayley starts the match off looking for all the plunder, but getting cut off at every turn. Bayley with a Jeff Hardy spot, hitting a clothesline on a seated Belair after running the barricade. This is was controlled mayhem. I mean, they got a golf cart involved. They pulled out everything except the kitchen sink. Both women took their fair share of sick bumps, Belair got a tough looking Bayley to belly on the stage. But Bayley made this one with all of the rough bumps she took, the worst being a KOD on a chair that she hit in the worst possible way with that move. Oh yeah, and the beale off the top of the golf cart through the table that didn’t break so they improvised a powerbomb spot to get the break. And top it all off with a cool, unique finish to allow Belair to retain. But seriously, get Bayley all of the ice packs in Riyadh.
RATING: ****1/2
Undisputed Universal WWE Championship: Roman Reigns (c) vs. Logan Paul
I hate this. I will say this right from the get-go. I hate this, it is transparent and I hate it. And I hate that they have to try to build up the possibility that Paul is a legit challenger to Reigns. Saudi Arabia seems… luke warm on Paul, which is pretty much the reaction he got in Toledo. I think we’re becoming dangerously close to the first Reigns babyface push where the crowds tired of it fast, but Vince insisted so we got a lot of crowds that shit on their top good guy.
This one was exclusively a story-telling match and only drove home the point that Roman Reigns has evolved into a master storyteller in that ring. There was a lot of walk and talk in between some huge spots because it had to be. You put a guy into an international main event in his third match, you better have someone that can walk him through. But I’ve got to say this. Despite some impressive looking stuff for Paul and Reigns making him look like a million bucks, Michael Cole absolutely destroyed this match. There’s getting into the action and then there’s going so far over the top that you’ve killed the mood and Cole killed the mood. He damn near orgasmed at a superman punch. Al Michaels didn’t go through puberty when he called the Miracle on Ice. The guy that called one of the greatest upsets in college football history when Appalachian State beat Michigan was able to convey the excitement of the moment without sounding like a schoogirl. But Michael Cole went so over the top, he made a match that he wasn’t physically involved in worse. Then Jake Paul showed up and threw quite possibly the worst looking punches I have ever seen in the ring. Start high and then apparently go directly into the toilet.
RATING: **
SHOW RATING: B-
Man, the main event drug down what was otherwise a pretty good show. My only hope is that this was a one-time main event trip for the Paul brothers and they can go back to being the special attraction while the adults will show up for talent like the Bloodline and Imperium and many more. Also, good lord, this show was as long as Mania. I don’t mind a four-hour show when you only give me 4 of them a year. But you’re going to give me another one in three weeks.
Oh, and if you’re following our predictive skills, we do have a new Finisher Podcast Predictions champion. Damage CTL the difference maker as Lisa outlasts Dan and Zack for the victory, 6-2 to a pair of 5-3s.
The Finisher 